“A burnout can come to anyone at anytime”

The year is 2017 and I have a burnout. I do not know what is happening to me, but burnout came and I feel empty.

I felt like I was a living dead in a second. As if I was no longer mentally present – there was only one body walking around doing things. I had lost myself, there was no Robin anymore. I was so empty, completely exhausted, no feelings, I felt nothing anymore. It took a while before thoughts of inadequacy and that I had done everything i can on this earth began to creep in. I had simply given everything I had to give. After a time when everything was empty, there was a wave of emotions, a shock to the body and mind. I felt bad, had dark thoughts and wanted to isolate myself from my surroundings. I did not know what was happening to me, I could not talk to anyone and I could not think that I had a burnout. I got professional help but it was hard for me to digest that I needed help. It took a toll on my ego at the time – I can not need help from a therapist! I received the help and that was the best I could do. It really was an eye opener for me! After a few sessions, I realized that I had got a burnout and was completely exhausted physically and mentally. The reason to this was that I never listened to myself and my mind, I did things that others thought you should do. I did not live MY life but lived as others said I should do. I had people around me who took all my energy but gave nothing to me. I had simply given everything for others and left myself in emptiness, without energy and without strength. With therapy, I realized how it all started: things I went through and swept under the rug. Everything that was hidden under the carpet came over me when I could no longer keep everything under it. It was the body that told me that now you have so many things you need to process, you need to stop and grab all these “monsters” that have been lying under the carpet all these years. I am a man at the age of 28, I study and I have a permanent job. I had a burnout.

A burnout can come to anyone and at any time! If this is happening to you or has already happened to you, then you are not the only one who has gone through this. To avoid a burnout, or to avoid history repeating itself, I want you to listen to yourself and feel how you feel. Listen to your body and mind. I wish no one needed to feel what I felt. With my story, I want to help others avoid a burnout or move on after having a burnout. Take care of yourselves and listen to yourselves!